Bottoms, new TMNT, Netflix’s The Machine, and every new movie to watch

Happy Friday, Polygon readers!

Each week, we round up the most notable releases new to streaming and VOD, highlighting the biggest and best new movies for you to watch at home.

This week, Bottoms, the raunchy high school comedy starring Rachel Sennott (Bodies Bodies Bodies) and Ayo Edebiri (The Bear), is finally available to rent on VOD. Peter Atencio’s action comedy The Machine starring comedian Bert Kreischer and Mark Hamill comes to streaming on Netflix, and the sci-fi horror thriller No One Will Save You starring Kaitlyn Dever (Booksmart) premieres on Hulu. There’s tons more exciting releases to choose from to stream and rent this weekend, including the horror-comedy slasher Slotherhouse and Guy Ritchie’s military action thriller The Covenant starring Jake Gyllenhaal.

Here’s everything new to watch this weekend!

New on Netflix

The Machine

Where to watch: Available to stream on Netflix

Image: Aleksandar Letic/Screen Gems

Genre: Action comedy
Run time: 1h 52m
Director: Peter Atencio
Cast: Bert Kreischer, Mark Hamill, Jimmy Tatro

Comedian-actor Bert Kreischer reenacts his viral story about a wild trip to Russia he took as a college freshman that earned him the nickname “The Machine.” Kreischer portrays a fictionalized version of himself who, 23 years later, is kidnapped by a Russian mobster along with his father (Mark Hamill) as part of an elaborate revenge scheme concerning a pocket watch. Yeah, I’m as confused as you are.

Spy Kids: Armageddon

Where to watch: Available to stream on Netflix

Image: Netflix

Genre: Adventure comedy
Run time: 1h 48m
Director: Robert Rodriguez
Cast: Gina Rodriguez, Zachary Levi, Connor Esterson

Spy Kids is back! Robert Rodriguez returns to his passion project, co-writing this entry with his son Racer Max, in what is the fifth movie in the franchise. Gone are Antonio Banderas, Carla Gugino, Alexa Vega, and Daryl Sabara (and Joel McHale and Jessica Alba from the previous entry); in are Gina Rodriguez and Zachary Levi. This time, the new spy kids have to stop a computer virus from taking over the world.

New on Hulu

Sanctuary

Where to watch: Available to stream on Hulu

Image: NEON

Genre: Erotic thriller
Run time: 1h 36m
Director: Zachary Wigon
Cast: Margaret Qualley, Christopher Abbott

The wealthy scion of a luxury hotel franchise (Christopher Abbott) is determined to enjoy one last fling with his regular dominatrix (Margaret Qualley). Upon learning her client wishes to end their relationship, the dominatrix hatches an impromptu plot to force him to confront both the nature of their liaisons and his own deep-seated insecurities.

No One Will Save You

Where to watch: Available to stream on Hulu

Image: 20th Century Studios

Genre: Sci-fi horror thriller
Run time: 1h 33m
Director: Brian Duffield
Cast: Kaitlyn Dever, Elizabeth Kaluev, Zack Duhame

Kaitlyn Dever (Booksmart) stars in this new sci-fi horror thriller as Brynn, a socially anxious shut-in whose childhood home is invaded by extraterrestrials. As she searches frantically for anyone to help her, Brynn is forced to confront the regrets of her past as she struggles to survive.

From our review:

While the action gets big and eventually moves outside to the surrounding wooded environs, Duffield firmly places No One Will Save You in the home invasion canon by making use of Brynn’s house itself, peering through glass window murals and peeking between the tresses of elaborate wood pillars. Even the appliances can strike fear; when Brynn initially encounters the invaders, she finds herself trapped behind the door of her refrigerator as they telepathically tear the kitchen asunder. It’s a frightening moment that emphasizes how Brynn’s once familiar and mundane home has been weaponized against her through the sheer presence of these otherworldly creatures.

Bad Axe

Where to watch: Available to stream on Hulu

Image: IFC Films

Genre: Documentary
Run time: 1h 40m
Director: David Siev
Cast: Skyler Janssen, Michael Meinhold, Chun Siev

This documentary follows the lives of the Sievs, an average Asian American family living in rural Michigan whose lives are upended in the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic. Harassed by neo-Nazis and haunted by memories of the Killing Fields of Cambodia, the Sievs fight to keep their family restaurant and the American dream alive in a time of great panic.

New on Prime Video

Guy Ritchie’s The Covenant

Where to watch: Available to stream on Prime Video

Photo: Christopher Raphael/MGM

Genre: Military action thriller
Run time: 2h 3m
Director: Guy Ritchie
Cast: Jake Gyllenhaal, Dar Salim, Sean Sagar

One of two movies coming out this year about American soldiers executing difficult missions with their interpreters (along with Ric Roman Waugh’s Kandahar), The Covenant sees Jake Gyllenhaal team up with Guy Ritchie for a wartime drama.

Cassandro

Where to watch: Available to stream on Prime Video

Image: Amazon Studios

Genre: Biographical drama
Run time: 1h 47m
Director: Roger Ross Williams
Cast: Gael García Bernal, Roberta Colindrez, Perla De La Rosa

Gael García Bernal (Station Eleven) stars in this new biopic as Saúl Armendáriz, a gay luchador from El Paso who regularly crosses the border to perform in wrestling matches. Donning the persona of Cassandro, he builds a new identity for himself as a flamboyant drag wrestler with a charismatic personality.

A Thousand and One

Where to watch: Available to stream on Prime Video

Image: Focus Features

Genre: Drama
Run time: 1h 57m
Director: A.V. Rockwell
Cast: Teyana Taylor, William Catlett, Josiah Cross

Set in 1994, A.V. Rockwell’s drama stars singer-actress Teyana Taylor (Coming 2 America) as Inez, a fiery-tempered woman who, after being released from Rikers Island, kidnaps her 6-year-old son in an attempt to both reconcile with him and provide an upbringing for him better than the one she had. It’s one of the best movies of the year, and it’s finally available for broader home viewing.

New on Paramount Plus

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem

Where to watch: Available to stream on Paramount Plus

Image: Nickelodeon/Paramount

Genre: Animated superhero action-comedy
Run time: 1h 39m
Director: Jeff Rowe
Cast: Micah Abbey, Shamon Brown Jr., Nicolas Cantu, Brady Noon

This Seth Rogen-produced animated reboot of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reimagines the origin story of Raphael, Donatello, Michelangelo, and Leonardo, four turtles mutated by a mysterious ooze who grow up under the tutelage of their adoptive father, Splinter (Jackie Chan). When the turtle brothers cross paths with April O’Neil (Ayo Edebiri), an aspiring high school journalist, the turtles decide to help her in uncovering a shadowy syndicate led by a mysterious crime boss who goes by the name “Superfly.”

New on Shudder

The Angry Black Girl and Her Monster

Where to watch: Available to stream on Shudder and AMC Plus

Image: RLJE Films

Genre: Sci-fi horror
Run time: 1h 31m
Director: Bomani J. Story
Cast: Laya DeLeon Hayes, Denzel Whitaker, Chad Coleman

This new sci-fi horror film follows a 17-year-old genius (Laya DeLeon Hayes) who uses her know-how to resurrect her dead brother and unleash him on the drug dealers and corrupt police officers who preyed upon him in life. Think Frankenstein, but with a modern twist.

New to rent

Bottoms

Where to watch: Available to rent on Amazon, Apple, and Vudu

Image: MGM

Genre: Comedy
Run time: 1h 31m
Director: Emma Seligman
Cast: Rachel Sennott, Ayo Edebiri, Marshawn Lynch

Teen girl comedies are back in a big way, and Bottoms is a standout of this year’s crop. A trio of comedic powerhouses star in this movie about high school girls who start a fight club to try and impress the popular girls at school they have crushes on. Chaos ensues.

Slotherhouse

Where to watch: Available to rent on Amazon, Apple, and Vudu

Genre: Slasher comedy
Run time: 1h 33m
Director: Matthew Goodhue
Cast: Stefan Kapicic, Lisa Ambalavanar, Olivia Rouyre

When a sorority girl adopts a sloth, a bunch of people start dying, posing the question: What if a slasher movie, but a sloth maybe did it?

Nandor Fodor and the Talking Mongoose

Where to watch: Available to rent on Amazon, Apple, and Vudu

Genre: Dark comedy
Run time: 1h 36m
Director: Adam Sigal
Cast: Simon Pegg, Minnie Driver, Christopher Lloyd

Simon Pegg plays a famous paranormal psychologist who is hired to investigate whether a mongoose can actually talk in this comedy very loosely based on a true story. Neil Gaiman is the voice of the mongoose. From that alone, you’re either in or out.