Let’s face it — you’re probably going to lose your 2021 NCAA Tournament pool. In fact, you’ll probably be out of the running before the end of the first weekend. It’s not your fault you’re terrible at picking games, though. Between all that’s going on in the world right now and trying to remember what channel TruTV is, you have a lot on your plate. But there are no excuses for having a bad March Madness bracket name. It doesn’t have to be the best, but if yours isn’t creative or funny, well, friendo, that’s on you. 

Don’t worry, we’re here to help. Below you’ll find suggestions for most of the expected top-eight seeds, be it a pun based on the team name, the coach’s name, or a key player’s name. Picking Gonzaga? You could go from “Zags to Riches.” Better yet, if you go with Ohio State, you could be drinking “Bottomless MiMusas” at the end of the tournament. No need for a “Payday Lohner” if your BYU pick works out or to get involved with another “Pons-i Scheme” if your Tennesse pick pays off. In fact, you’ll be “Cade In Full” if you pick Oklahoma State and the Cowboys cut down the nets.

Some of those weren’t great, but we’re going to start “Gaining Mo’Mentum” when we get to Oklahoma and “Trendon Upward” with LSU. We also have you covered if you went “Out On Aleem” and picked Wisconsin or ignored the “Turgeon General’s Warning” and picked Maryland. You’ll look like a “Mensah Member” — and be “Kicking Aztecs” — if your pick of San Diego State wins it all, and if you like Virginia to win another title, you can say you’ve “Bennett There, Done That.” No one will be able to deny you have the “Primo Picks” if your choice of Alabama goes all the way, and you’ll truly be in a “Teague Of Legends” if Baylor dances to the title.

Hopefully these bracket names aren’t too much of a “Shaka To The System” (Texas), but we’re going to keep going “Hard In The Painter” (Purdue) so they’re “Served Up On a Santos-Silva Platter” (Texas Tech) for you. Clearly, we’re not afraid to “Mobley Go Where No Man Has Gone Before” (USC) with our suggestions. We have “Garretteed Satisfaction” (Kansas) for everyone, whether you expect to be “King Of The Castleon” (Florida) or finish second because you’re “Always the McBridesmaid, Never the McBride” (West Virginia). Either way, you’ll at least have a good bracket name. Sure, it’s “Slim Picketts” (Missouri) for some teams, but as you’ll see below, Iowa is the only team we struck out on … just kidding — “Made You Luka.”

By now, you’re realizing our success rate with bracket names is about the same as your picks, but “Zero Ducks Given” (Oregon) on our part — we have no shame. If nothing else, these suggestions will hopefully inspire your “Mad Sills” (Arkansas) to kick in gear and think of something better (which you surely can). After all, the best bracket names will be inside jokes or references so crude we can’t print them here anyway (just leave Sister Jean out of it, please!), so we can only help so much. 

But there’s no need to “Curbelo Your Enthusiasm” (Illinois) about picking a bracket name. Just get “In The Izzone” (Michigan State), find “The Wright Stuff” (Villanova), and maybe you’ll hit a “Noles In One” (Florida State). Even if you arrive at a “Fork In Jerreaud” (Houston), just remember, you can come up with something that makes the rest of your bracket pool think, “That S*** Creigh(ton).” 

OK, you’re sick of the puns. We admit, it’s “A Tad Much” (Colorado), but we do it “For Love Of The Game” (UNC). Let us have our “One Shining Mormont” (BYU). Our work is done. After all, “What More Do Juwant?” (Michigan)

Funniest, Best March Madness bracket names in 2021

Gonzaga Bulldogs

  • Zags To Riches
  • Going, Going, Gonzaga
  • A Few Good Men
  • Sealed With A Kispert/A Little Kis-pert (shout out to Bill Raftery)
  • Yippee Ayayi, Mother******
  • Timme More/Timme What You Got
  • Suggs And Kisses (or Suggs and Kisperts, if you want to double up)
  • The Bigger They Are, The Nembharder They Fall
  • Three The Nembhard Way/School Of Nembhard Knocks/etc.
  • Last Strawther

Baylor Bears

  • Baylor Made
  • Grin And Bear It
  • Just Drew It
  • Out Of Your Teague/Teague Of Legends
  • Bear MaCio
  • Butler Did It
  • No Ifs, Ands, Or Butlers
  • Salute The Flagler
  • Flo Ridas
  • Vital Signs

Illinois Fighting Illini

  • Champaign Wishes
  • E-I E-I A-Yo
  • Ayo U (good one if you’re always late to pay for your bracket entry)
  • Cup Of Kofi/Kofi Grinder/Kofi Maker/Instant Kofi
  • Cockburn, Baby, Burn
  • Curbelo Your Enthusiasm
  • Frazier’s Edge
  • By Giorgi, I Think I Got It
  • Ain’t It Grandison/Grandison Slam
  • Case Of Da’Montes

Michigan Wolverines

  • What More Do Juwant?
  • Livers & Let Die/Livers To Fight Another Day
  • Big Game Hunters
  • Turn Those Franz Upside Down
  • Chaundeeeeeeee’s Nuts

Houston Cougars

  • Houston, We Have A Winner
  • Cougar Town
  • Kickin’ Sasser
  • Run Of The Mills
  • Grimes & Punishment/High Grimes & Misdemeanors
  • Jarreaud Less Traveled/Fork In Jarreaud 
  • “Deeky” Blinders
  • “Deeky” Friday

Alabama Crimson Tide

  • Tidal Wave
  • Ballin’ Oates
  • Quinerly Bird Gets The Worm
  • Primo Picks
  • Smokin’ Herbert

Ohio State Buckeyes

  • Win The Big Buckeyes
  • THE Winning Bracket
  • Blow The Liddell Off It/Flip Your Liddell
  • And Justice For All
  • Top Of The Key/Key To VIctory
  • Bottomless MiMusas

Iowa Hawkeyes

  • Fran Stan
  • Luka Who’s Talking/Luka What You Made Me Do/Made You Luka
  • Word To The Wieskamp
  • Tap The Keegan
  • Mic Check, One-Toussaint

Arkansas Razorbacks

  • Hog Heaven
  • Feelin’ Moody/Moody Blues (when/if Arkanasas loses)
  • Holy Moses
  • Tate With Destiny
  • Sweetest Notae
  • It Ain’t Over Til It’s Vanover
  • The Sills That Pay The Bills/Mad Sills

Kansas Jayhawks

  • Yes We Kansas!
  • Chalk Rocks (for the person who always picks the higher seed)
  • Self Esteem/Self Worth/Self Improvement
  • Brains And Braun
  • Garretteed Satisfaction

West Virginia Mountaineers

  • Huggins And Kisses
  • Always The McBridesmaid, Never The McBride
  • McNeil Before Me
  • Sherman’s March
  • A Bridges Too Far
  • Oscar-Winning Bracket
  • The Tshiebwe, The Truth, & The Light

Texas Longhorns

  • Pick Smart, Not Hard
  • Shaka To The System
  • Sims City
  • Cobra Kai
  • Coleman Coolers

Virginia Cavaliers

  • Hoo Done It
  • Bennett There, Done That
  • Bet The Hauser/Hauser Party
  • Buy Low, Morsell High
  • Every Last Morsell
  • Real McKoys
  • Huff, Puff & Blow This Bracket Down

Purdue Boilermakers

  • This Is How We Purdue It
  • Spoilermakers (If you pick some big upsets)
  • Go Hard In The Painter
  • Hello, Newman!

Villanova Wildcats

  • SuperNova
  • Wright Stuff
  • Swider Web/Swider Bite

Oklahoma State Cowboys

  • Okie Dokie
  • How ‘Bout Them Cowboys?!
  • Save A  Horse, Ride The Cowboys
  • Cade In Full
  • Going CunningHAM
  • Most Likekele To Succeed
  • Here Comes The Boone/Boone Goes The Dynamite
  • Flavors Of The Month

Florida State Seminoles

  • Noles In One
  • Just Say Noles
  • For Whom The Bell Noles
  • All About The Hamiltons
  • Polite Society
  • Gray Matters
  • Balsa Dancing
  • ‘Chips & Balsa
  • CakeWalkers
  • ‘Quan Fishin’/’Quan And Done (when/if FSU loses)

Creighton Bluejays

  • That S*** Creigh(ton)
  • Feelin’ Blue(jays) (when/if Creighton loses)
  • Ballock So Hard
  • Show Me The Mahoney
  • ‘Reefer Madness
  • Council Of Bishops

Colorado Buffaloes

  • Buffalo Soldiers
  • Roaring Boyle/Boyle-ing Hot
  • A Tad Much/A Tad Disappinting (when/if Colorado loses)
  • March Tadness
  • March Maddoxnes
  • Mt. McKinley
  • The Wright Stuff
  • May The 4th Be With You
  • Sound The Horne
  • Battery Powered
  • Schwartz And All
  • CakeWalkers
  • Walk In The Parqet
  • Served Up On A de Silva Platter

Texas Tech Red Raiders

  • Run & Guns Up
  • Fear The Beard
  • Mac Attack/Born To Mac/Return Of The Mac/Big Mac
  • Served Up On a Santos-Silva Platter
  • Ring Around The McCullar
  • Cobra Kyler

Oregon Ducks

  • Mighty Ducks
  • Quack Attack
  • Zero Ducks Given
  • Work Of Duarte/Duarte Of The Deal
  • Dante’s Inferno
  • I Got It All Figueroa’d Out

Wisconsin Badgers

  • Get Your Gard Up/On Gard/Standing Gard
  • A Ruevers Runs Through It
  • Once Bitten, Trice Shy
  • D’Mitrik Or Treat
  • Build The Wahl/Run Through A Wahl
  • Out On Aleem

USC Trojans

  • Enfield of 64
  • Tahj Mahal
  • Evan Sent
  • Mobley Go Where No Man Has Gone Before
  • Max Power/To The Max
  • Shot Across The Baumann

Tennessee Volunteers

  • Springer Has Sprung/Springer In My Step
  • Hail To The Victors/To The Victors Go The Spoils/Victor-y Is Mine
  • Pons-i Scheme
  • The Ives Have It
  • The Ives Of March
  • Vescovi-d 19 Pandemic
  • Incredible Fulk-erson

San Diego State Aztecs

  • Kiss My Aztecs/Kicking Your Aztecs
  • Dutcher Ovens
  • Arop-A-Dope/End Of My Arop
  • Mensah Member
  • Break Loose Of Your Schakels
  • Complete Seiko/Seiko Mode
  • Dinwiddie Banter

BYU Cougars

  • Cougar Town
  • Gaining Mormontum
  • One Shining Mormont
  • Hope In Pope
  • In Haarms Way
  • With Open Haarms/At Haarms Length
  • Death Knell
  • Payday Lohner
  • Go Harding In The Paint
  • Harward Show

Oklahoma Sooners

  • Get Off My Lon!/Lon Mowers
  • Reavesdropping
  • Manek Panic
  • How Could You Be So Harkless?
  • Gaining Mo’Mentum
  • Sweet Umoja-tions
  • King Of The Hill
  • Alondes Have More Fun
  • Vision Kueth/Hero’s Kueth

LSU Tigers

  • Patiently Wade-ing
  • Glory Days/Days Of Thunder/etc.
  • Turn Down For Watford
  • Trendon Upward
  • Pick Smart, Not Hard
  • Let’s Get Hyatt/Ridin’ Hyatt
  • LeBlanc Check

Missouri Tigers

  • Mizzery Loves Company
  • Say It Ain’t ‘Zo (when/if Mizzou loses)
  • Just How I Dru It Up
  • Xavier Of The World
  • On Pinsons And Needles
  • Buggsin’ Out
  • Slim Picketts

Florida Gators

  • I’m The Mann/Mann Up/Mann-To-Mann
  • King Of The Castleton
  • Appleby: Eatin’ Good In The Neighborhood
  • It’s a Locke!
  • Payne In The Ass

Loyola-Chicago Ramblers

  • Ramblin’ Wreck Of a Bracket
  • Mean Sister Jean Machine
  • Sister Act II
  • Krutwiggin’ Out

North Carolina Tar Heels

  • For Love Of The Game/Love & Basketball
  • Sharpe-y!
  • Lookin’ Sharpe
  • Go Ahead, Make My Day’Ron
  • Long Armando Of The Law
  • Leeky Blinders
  • Leeky Friday

Michigan State Spartans

  • In The Izzone 
  • Bet The Hauser
  • Xavier Of The World
  • Rockett Roll
  • MegaWatts
  • That’s Watts Up!

Maryland Terrapins

  • Turtle Power
  • Turgeon’s General Warning
  • Wiggins Out
  • An Eye For An Ayala
  • Ayala Come Back Now, Ya Hear?
  • It Takes Hart/Clear Eyes, Full Hart, Can’t Lose
  • Buy Low, Morsell High
  • Every Last Morsell





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